Musing's

BY LUCY.

Periodically, I like to write about life. The depth of it. The pain of it. The beauty of it. The journey of it. The learnings from it. When I do, I share it here.

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Stories from life
Feeling feelings
Sometimes controversial opinions

June 15, 2023

Why burning down my 'successful' life was the best thing I ever did

It was a Thursday back in February 2018. The rain hadn’t stopped for months and London was right in the depths of what felt like the longest winter we’d ever had. The dark, damp days had started to getting to me so I’d taken refuge in a hot yoga class to warm up. The scent of palo santo blended with the sweat of 50 people pervaded the room. It was bonus day at work. They’d told us it had been a bad year and not to expect much. I peaked into the envelope, hopeful, as soon as they slid it across the table: £130k. But there I lay, in savasana, with hot, salty tears streaming down my face: I’d never felt emptier.

Read More
Stories from life
Managing the mind

September 4, 2023

The curse of the helper

Everything felt infused with irritation. I was doing all the things for everyone else that I thought I should be doing. I was doing all the acts of service. I was, technically, loving those people. And yet. It felt like every act I did, rather than being infused with love, was infused with a shards of glass shooting out of every plate I stacked.

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions
Stories from life

February 23, 2023

Single in my 30s: What I came to realise when I really sat to understand the reasons why..

I always thought it was down to my mildly intense anxious attachment stuff playing out... that and just low key hating dating apps. But then as I started to date a little bit more than I usually do... I was faced with some of the real reasons I'd been avoiding it for so long... and here they are..

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions
Stories from life

January 18, 2023

What nobody tells you about leaving a career

It’s been 2.5 years since I hop, skipped and jumped out of the trading floor and into self employed life. In all honesty, I never thought I’d have the courage to do it - I used to wake up in the middle of the night at times in a cold sweat, equally panicked about the prospect of leaving as I was about the prospect of never fully claiming my life. 

Read More
Feeling feelings
Stories from life

September 29, 2022

Squashed under a tonne of emotional bricks

There are moments in life that hit you like a tonne of bricks. You can be pottering along with everything seemingly fine until suddenly, out of nowhere you get a WhatsApp that makes your stomach flip and everything go a little blurry and tunnel vision like and suddenly it feels like nothing is fine anymore.

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

Why we are all struggling so damn much

So I have a hunch about this.  And before I dive in, I’m not talking about people who have clinically diagnosed mental illness. I’m talking us lay people who potter about life...

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions

September 20, 2022

WHAT I BELIEVE TO BE TRUE ABOUT WOMEN

 I remember when I started to realise the reality of being female – aged about 6 and doing a running race for sports day.

Read More
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

Can we all just STOP with the positive thinking for a second?

So the other day, I got triggered - which brought to light something which felt apt and important to share.

Read More
Stories from life

September 20, 2022

Transatlantic Ponderings.

I’ve often found as I take off to go somewhere new that a sense of peace comes over me, a sense of freedom, a sense of truly living.

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

‘I’m starting to wonder if I’ve gone crazy’ – Are you losing the plot? Or are you having an awakening?

I’ve scooted around talking about this for far too long because I still find it all a bit awkward because it’s a bit of a divisive subject...

Read More
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

How to get out of feeling like you’re waiting for life to start… and actually make it start

I felt for a long time like I was waiting for life to properly begin. It was a slightly bizarre experience because on paper everything was great...

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

Here’s why family time is, sometimes, so damn hard

For some of us, this period of the year is the most magical time. For others of us, this period of the year can bring up alllll of the stuff.

Read More
Managing the mind
Feeling feelings

September 20, 2022

You know, something feeling terrifying doesn’t necessarily mean you shouldn’t do it.

Fear.  We all know it. The tightness in the chest. The block in the belly. Sweaty palms. Heart racing. That signal that something isn’t right.

Read More
Managing the mind
Stories from life

September 20, 2022

I know what I’ll do. I’ll move to Australia and start again there. Then I’ll be happy.

This was a genuine thought I had probably about 5 years ago. London is the issue. The grey skies are the problem. If I could move to Australia everything would be better.

Read More
Stories from life

September 20, 2022

The letter I wrote to myself the day I resigned

I was looking through the old notes on my phone the other day and came across a scramble of words which I wrote when I was on the tube back from work.

Read More
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

This is why you panic when you boss asks you for a ‘quick chat’

Not just me? I’m glad to hear it. Well, I’m not because that sucks for you, but I’m glad because it affirms that I’m not alone. Smalls wins.

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

Controversial opinion: being an overachiever is not a good thing.

Oooof who did I trigger? Anyone get a little pang in the chest? Or a little flip of the stomach? Or just feeling a bit annoyed? Sorry, but equally, not sorry at all.

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions

September 20, 2022

Our working world is a little messed up, isn’t it?

A couple of Tuesdays ago, I was feeling particularly tired. Like really tired. It was one of those days...

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions
Stories from life

September 20, 2022

Who are you? The dangers of identity

It’s interesting how we define ourselves. A few years ago, if someone had asked me who I was, I would have said: high-achiever, sporty, middle class, academic, Londoner.

Read More
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

The stories we tell ourselves

Humans are just the most gorgeously complex, delicate, wonderful creatures. I’m sitting in a cafe in Marylebone and it’s a gorgeous September Sunday morning...

Read More
Managing the mind
Stories from life

September 20, 2022

Anyone else finding life post lockdown a liiiiittle bit weird?

And just like that my trip in Mexico was over. Gone were the tacos. The insanely spicy chilli sauce which I poured by mistake all over my tacos and nearly died eating...

Read More
Feeling feelings
Stories from life

September 20, 2022

Breathing changed me. It can change you too.

I never went out looking for breathwork. It found me. When it did, my life changed forever and just through.. breathing.

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions

September 20, 2022

The Blame Game

So I don’t like football. Like. At all. To be honest I find it boring and I don’t particularly enjoy the culture associated with it (shoot me).

Read More
Managing the mind
Feeling feelings

September 20, 2022

How to deal with “rejection”

That feeling of rejection. The worst right? The stab in the gut. That feeling of utter uselessness. Kind of feels like the world might be crumbling down on you? I feel you. I see you.

Read More
Stories from life

September 20, 2022

Why I left my job with nothing to go to. (cont.)

I didn’t know what I wanted to write about today. I just thought I’d start and see what came out...

Read More
Managing the mind
Sometimes controversial opinions

September 20, 2022

That thing that’s keeping us all ‘stuck’

A couple of months ago, I found myself in that icky period of a relationship when you kind of both know it probably can’t go any further but equally don’t really want to accept that or take any kind of step to take action.

Read More
Sometimes controversial opinions
Managing the mind
Feeling feelings

September 20, 2022

Britain: We have a problem

I feel like I may well start sounding like a broken record if I carry on talking like this. That said, I’m willing to take the risk...

Read More
Stories from life

September 20, 2022

Confession: I fell into a COVID hole

Despite having written that post last week about how we all have the choice to choose how we feel, which, I still maintain is 100%

Read More
Feeling feelings
Managing the mind

September 20, 2022

How I (and you) can choose to feel good in the middle of lockdown numero 6571

You know what I realised the other day? Drumroll. I realised that literally nothing that happens in life can impact the way that I choose to feel.

Read More
Managing the mind
Sometimes controversial opinions

September 20, 2022

Anyone else sometimes feel like they are sleeping through life?

I got my first real six-string, bought it at the five-and-dime, played it ’til my fingers bled, was the summer of ’69.

Read More

Why we are all struggling so damn much

So I have a hunch about this.  And before I dive in, I’m not talking about people who have clinically diagnosed mental illness. I’m talking us lay people who potter about life...

Read More

WHAT I BELIEVE TO BE TRUE ABOUT WOMEN

 I remember when I started to realise the reality of being female – aged about 6 and doing a running race for sports day.

Read More

Can we all just STOP with the positive thinking for a second?

So the other day, I got triggered - which brought to light something which felt apt and important to share.

Read More

Transatlantic Ponderings.

I’ve often found as I take off to go somewhere new that a sense of peace comes over me, a sense of freedom, a sense of truly living.

Read More

‘I’m starting to wonder if I’ve gone crazy’ – Are you losing the plot? Or are you having an awakening?

I’ve scooted around talking about this for far too long because I still find it all a bit awkward because it’s a bit of a divisive subject...

Read More

How to get out of feeling like you’re waiting for life to start… and actually make it start

I felt for a long time like I was waiting for life to properly begin. It was a slightly bizarre experience because on paper everything was great...

Read More

Here’s why family time is, sometimes, so damn hard

For some of us, this period of the year is the most magical time. For others of us, this period of the year can bring up alllll of the stuff.

Read More

You know, something feeling terrifying doesn’t necessarily mean you shouldn’t do it.

Fear.  We all know it. The tightness in the chest. The block in the belly. Sweaty palms. Heart racing. That signal that something isn’t right.

Read More

I know what I’ll do. I’ll move to Australia and start again there. Then I’ll be happy.

This was a genuine thought I had probably about 5 years ago. London is the issue. The grey skies are the problem. If I could move to Australia everything would be better.

Read More

The letter I wrote to myself the day I resigned

I was looking through the old notes on my phone the other day and came across a scramble of words which I wrote when I was on the tube back from work.

Read More

This is why you panic when you boss asks you for a ‘quick chat’

Not just me? I’m glad to hear it. Well, I’m not because that sucks for you, but I’m glad because it affirms that I’m not alone. Smalls wins.

Read More

Controversial opinion: being an overachiever is not a good thing.

Oooof who did I trigger? Anyone get a little pang in the chest? Or a little flip of the stomach? Or just feeling a bit annoyed? Sorry, but equally, not sorry at all.

Read More

Our working world is a little messed up, isn’t it?

A couple of Tuesdays ago, I was feeling particularly tired. Like really tired. It was one of those days...

Read More

Who are you? The dangers of identity

It’s interesting how we define ourselves. A few years ago, if someone had asked me who I was, I would have said: high-achiever, sporty, middle class, academic, Londoner.

Read More

The stories we tell ourselves

Humans are just the most gorgeously complex, delicate, wonderful creatures. I’m sitting in a cafe in Marylebone and it’s a gorgeous September Sunday morning...

Read More

Anyone else finding life post lockdown a liiiiittle bit weird?

And just like that my trip in Mexico was over. Gone were the tacos. The insanely spicy chilli sauce which I poured by mistake all over my tacos and nearly died eating...

Read More

Breathing changed me. It can change you too.

I never went out looking for breathwork. It found me. When it did, my life changed forever and just through.. breathing.

Read More

The Blame Game

So I don’t like football. Like. At all. To be honest I find it boring and I don’t particularly enjoy the culture associated with it (shoot me).

Read More

How to deal with “rejection”

That feeling of rejection. The worst right? The stab in the gut. That feeling of utter uselessness. Kind of feels like the world might be crumbling down on you? I feel you. I see you.

Read More

Why I left my job with nothing to go to. (cont.)

I didn’t know what I wanted to write about today. I just thought I’d start and see what came out...

Read More

That thing that’s keeping us all ‘stuck’

A couple of months ago, I found myself in that icky period of a relationship when you kind of both know it probably can’t go any further but equally don’t really want to accept that or take any kind of step to take action.

Read More

Britain: We have a problem

I feel like I may well start sounding like a broken record if I carry on talking like this. That said, I’m willing to take the risk...

Read More

Confession: I fell into a COVID hole

Despite having written that post last week about how we all have the choice to choose how we feel, which, I still maintain is 100%

Read More

How I (and you) can choose to feel good in the middle of lockdown numero 6571

You know what I realised the other day? Drumroll. I realised that literally nothing that happens in life can impact the way that I choose to feel.

Read More

Anyone else sometimes feel like they are sleeping through life?

I got my first real six-string, bought it at the five-and-dime, played it ’til my fingers bled, was the summer of ’69.

Read More

Bring back the tantrum

A couple of weeks ago, prior to being plunged back into the fog of another lockdown, I spent the day down at my sisters with her husband and my two little nephews...

Read More

Why on earth I chose to leave a job with nothing to go to.

I never really planned to go into banking. To be honest, I never really planned to go into anything.

Read More

And the world went stop.

Coronavirus. Self Isolation. Quarantine. Panic buying. Loo roll shortages. Protein shortages. OAT MILK shortages. The world has gone crazy.

Read More

How not speaking for 2.5 days can help you understand yourself better

On a Saturday evening a few months ago, at an unknown hour, I opened my mouth and muttered my first words in 2.5 days.

Read More

Energy what?

How on earth did the conventional, logical, maybe a little bit over achieving & control freakish, home counties science nerd come to decide that energy healing was actually a legitimate thing?

Read More

Squashed under a tonne of emotional bricks

There are moments in life that hit you like a tonne of bricks. You can be pottering along with everything seemingly fine until suddenly, out of nowhere you get a WhatsApp that makes your stomach flip and everything go a little blurry and tunnel vision like and suddenly it feels like nothing is fine anymore.

Read More

What nobody tells you about leaving a career

It’s been 2.5 years since I hop, skipped and jumped out of the trading floor and into self employed life. In all honesty, I never thought I’d have the courage to do it - I used to wake up in the middle of the night at times in a cold sweat, equally panicked about the prospect of leaving as I was about the prospect of never fully claiming my life. 

Read More

Single in my 30s: What I came to realise when I really sat to understand the reasons why..

I always thought it was down to my mildly intense anxious attachment stuff playing out... that and just low key hating dating apps. But then as I started to date a little bit more than I usually do... I was faced with some of the real reasons I'd been avoiding it for so long... and here they are..

Read More

Why burning down my 'successful' life was the best thing I ever did

It was a Thursday back in February 2018. The rain hadn’t stopped for months and London was right in the depths of what felt like the longest winter we’d ever had. The dark, damp days had started to getting to me so I’d taken refuge in a hot yoga class to warm up. The scent of palo santo blended with the sweat of 50 people pervaded the room. It was bonus day at work. They’d told us it had been a bad year and not to expect much. I peaked into the envelope, hopeful, as soon as they slid it across the table: £130k. But there I lay, in savasana, with hot, salty tears streaming down my face: I’d never felt emptier.

Read More

The curse of the helper

Everything felt infused with irritation. I was doing all the things for everyone else that I thought I should be doing. I was doing all the acts of service. I was, technically, loving those people. And yet. It felt like every act I did, rather than being infused with love, was infused with a shards of glass shooting out of every plate I stacked.

Read More

Testimonials

"You skilfully adapted the sessions to what I needed, shared relevant follow-up materials/sources, and strategically incorporated breathwork to generate the highest impact. During the 3 months, the work felt smooth and effortless; in hindsight, relevant shifts happened that would have required much more work and taken much longer (if at all) if it hadn't been for your guidance."

⎯ Elena, Financial Services

"Lucy changed the trajectory of my life. Sounds dramatic, but she really did! I've gone from feeling burnt out, stuck and emotionally drained to confident, energetic and excited about the future again. Dive in, open your heart, let Lucy guide you, I'm so glad I did!"

⎯ Caroline, Project Manager in Financial Services

"Thanks to the continued work I have done with Lucy I found the confidence to ask for a 12 month sabbatical from my current job and during that time have pursued those things that I love and which spark joy and interest within me. This has taken me down a path of self improvement and learning that I did not think I would be on, but one which I am wholeheartedly loving being immersed in. I would never have had the courage to do this without Lucy's help."

⎯ Helen, Financial Services

"Three sessions with Lucy have brought me a sense of calm I haven't had in a very long time. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the magic that is breathwork, but the few sessions that I have done with Lucy have gone beyond anything I have ever imagined possible."

⎯ Will, Lawyer